Passing Notes

Notes from a Parent/Teacher to Parents and Teachers

May
28

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Strategies for the learning disabled child: The home-school connection

Category: Tackling Tough Issues Tags: , , , , , , , , Leave a Comment

Last week, Ms Whitworth,- guest blogger, – graced us with her presence and wrote  about some strategies on the topic of children with learning disabilities.  Today, she’s sharing with you some ways to keep good flow and communication between your home and your child’s school

HOMEwork 

Homework is often a source of debate for parents, students, and educators. How much should my child have? How much is too much? What is the purpose of this? Why do I have to do this? How much should I help my child?  These are questions that are often asked by many a parent. Whatever the situation, here are some ways to help ease the distress of nightly homework:

  • if possible, remain with them while they do homework
  • model for them that sometimes you have to bring work home with you for your job
  • it sounds obvious, but I can’t stress the importance of this one:  read with them
  • encourage them to build up great organizational skills which will aid in consistently remembering to complete homework
  •  break down the homework session into shorter periods to increase attention span
  • provide all the supplies needed for the homework
  • maintain open communication with your child’s teacher about homework and policies

Perseverance 

Teaching your child to continue through struggles is one of the best things a parent can do. Life is not always easy, there are sometimes rules to follow that are less than pleasant, and difficulties and stresses often occur when you really don’t need them. A child who learns that even though there are difficulties, they can still reach a goal, is one who will have an easier time of things as they get older. The decision to baby or indulge a child’s every whim doesn’t help them become mature, responsible adults, and is especially disastrous in the case of a learning disabled child. Because learning is often difficult for the child who has a learning disability, they will experience more struggles than most children. Helping coach your child to persevere in the face of difficulty, to try new strategies, to take a break and come back to it with fresh eyes, and to ask for help when needed, are all very important in aiding your child to grow up to become a successful, independent, and confident adult.

 

Help Wanted: Apply Within

Working to maintain good communication is an important part of any healthy relationship. If your schedule allows it, volunteering in your child’s classroom will allow you to provide some much needed help in the classroom, and show your child that his or her education is important to you so as to foster that same value in your child. Teachers these days are often very limited in the amount of one-on-one time they get to spend with each student and any additional help you can provide will better your relationship with your child’s school. In addition, learning what the routines and experiences are at school will also provide the opportunity for you to talk with your child at home and discuss things that were misunderstood, difficult, or just not heard in a relaxed environment.

Hoping to share my ideas with you in the near future,

Ms Whitworth

 

Note:

Last week’s post included a list of websites and resources from dependable and knowledgeable sources on  learning disabilities.  They’ve been posted again for your convenience.

May
23

By

At-home strategies for learning disabled children

Category: Tackling Tough Issues Tags: , , , , , , Leave a Comment

(Please welcome Ms Whitworth back for her third guest blog appearance!)

It’s always a challenge to figure out the perfect balance between friend and foe when it comes to raising children. Children, in general, need routine and consistency in their lives to maintain good social and emotional development. It becomes even harder to decide what to do when parenting is complicated by other factors such as learning disabilities or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) – 2 commonly diagnosed things today.

In the early stages of cognitive development, children are concrete thinkers who benefit from tangible solutions to problems, so keeping tangible incentives, rewards, and routinely enforcing expected behaviours concretely is a must for any child. Below you will find tips for sticking to routines which will benefit your child (ren).

 Concretely lay out all the expectations

When starting any new routine with a child, whether this is at school, home, or daycare, explaining all parts of an expectation is crucial. I suggest having some sort of chart, which outlines the expectation (washing dishes for example every Monday night) and also has a spot to include the incentives that could help your child stay motivated to actually do these chores. If you tell your child to wash the dishes when you don’t feel like it one night, and then it’s another 3 weeks before you ask them to do it again, this does not set up the expectation that washing dishes is part of normal routine and something that must get done. Explaining why things are important is also something which helps children understand the reason behind the belief. If you can give them a real-world reason why they need to learn this it also helps them to remain motivated in their tasks.

Consistency is key

This brings me to my next point, when outlining expectations, be sure to remain consistent. If your rule is that there is no junk food during the week then maintain that even when you go to a party in the summer. Help your child make healthier choices at the party so that they cancel that craving, but also understand that a rule is a rule. Maintaining and consistently enforcing a rule that you have established as a family will be crucial in maximizing the lessons to be learned and getting the behaviour you want.

If there are siblings, there are likely to be conflicts – every family has them! My brother and I fight all the time, but usually it is resolved through good problem solving skills, (and occasionally my mother still has to lay down the law!) Because children with learning disabilities often find academic activities more challenging and need more one-on-one help with homework, there is often an increased need for parental support.  This may be where most conflicts will arise. Balancing the time, as best you can, so that you spend it with each child engaging in meaningful conversation or activities. This extra time will reduce the conflict between siblings and also between parents. However, WHEN quarrels arise (and you can quote me on this: they will!), make sure that your learning disabled child is given the same consequences, conditions, room to grow, and security as your other children. I think this book (“The Complete Learning Disabilities Handbook”) says it exceptionally,  the “child with learning disabilities should not be coddled or overprotected. With rare exceptions, that child needs the same parameters the other siblings are given and similar consequences when guidelines are violated”. Remaining consistent will help your child to learn that there are certain rules in society that they have to follow no matter what.

Intensive Behavourial Interventions

Knowledge is power, as the old saying goes. When you have a child diagnosed with learning disabilities or any other special need, learn all you can about it. If you know strategies to help your child you will be more likely to have a good working relationship with your child. The library, both public and the one at your child’s school, is a good place to look as they will often have many resources. In some extreme cases, intensive behavioural intervention strategies are needed to help your child function properly on a daily basis. Gain information, ask questions, seek support, and advocate for your child. As a parent, you are the one and only person who will always be there when support is needed; use that role to better your child’s life. There are also many good websites and association pages online these days; check out some listed at the end of this piece.

Have “The Talk” with your child

No, I am not talking about choices surrounding sexuality and safe sex here; instead what I mean is talking about every day things: values, goals, expectations, dreams, and any concerns or stresses that the family or individuals in the family are experiencing. Talking with your child is one of the most important things you can do to help foster a great relationship with your kids. Many parenting experts believe that having quality time with your child and taking the time to learn about that unique person your child is, especially as they grow older and develop more into their own person, will help you notice any difficulties your child is having -whether those be academic, social, behavioural, or otherwise. This will allow you to develop and nurture your role as:  provider, support system, role-model and friend, and seek help and support sooner to help your child reach their maximum potential.

Finally, remember that just because your child has been diagnosed with a learning disability does NOT mean that he or she cannot learn, just that there may be different strategies required and more hands-on and involved educating involved. Learning Disability does not have to mean Learning Dysfunctional.

Join me next time for practical home-school strategies for families with children with Learning Disabilities.

Till then,

Ms Whitworth

A list of resources for learning disabilities: